My Personal Forgiveness Story

Dear Newsletter Family,    Once you read this story, you’ll be able to imagine there is so much more to the events, and depth of feeling with each sentence I’ve written. But for the purposes of this newsletter, I’ve kept this story concise. The end of this newsletter is what I am so nostalgic to share with you… My moment of synchronicity….      And by the way, my full story can be found in my book From My Heart to Yours: Based on a True Story.    My father passed away about 8.5 years ago.   Upon his passing, I asked myself many questions about his life… And about the meaning of life in general. One of the questions I asked myself was, “What was my dad’s legacy? What did he teach me that I want to carry on?”   The answer came to me immediately.   There are two things my father taught me:    To give back    Forgiveness      I knew I would carry his legacy by giving back. And since I had already been on my own personal journey of forgiveness, I knew I was already carrying out that legacy as well.   Three years prior to my dad’s passing, my own journey of forgiveness began.   The person I had to forgive was my ex-husband.   My ex-husband had coerced and manipulated my father into purchasing a business. The business was actually a really bad investment, and did not make any money. But my ex-husband had teamed up with the seller of that business and made up paperwork and financial statements to show it was actually profitable. And my ex-husband was to get a commission off the selling price.   I had zero idea all of this was going on. And the day I found out, was the day I knew my life had taken a very different turn. I knew I could not trust the man I called my husband. He had set out to manipulate, and ultimately deeply hurt, my father, myself and every member of my family.   So my process of divorce began….   At the time, I had been married for 8.5 years. And I was 30 years old. I had known my ex-husband since high school, since I was 15 years old… So I had grown up with him, and known him for half my life.   It was a deeply painful time for me. The level of pain and guilt I felt was unbearable.   My guilt came from the fact that the man I had loved, the man that I brought into my family, and they made him one of their own, turned on us so ruthlessly.   It was a period where I was lost, confused, sad, hurt and a myriad of other emotions all at the same time.   But at the age of 30, I knew I was too young to be bitter at life.   So I embarked on a journey to forgive, and to make sense of my life.   {This journey led me to meditation}.   I began the process of forgiveness while I was going through my divorce.   I just didn’t want to hold resentment or grudges. I knew enough about forgiveness to know I was doing this for myself, not for my ex-husband.   And it worked…   I began to feel lighter. I removed myself (veeeeeeery slowly, day by day) from the pain he had caused myself and my family. I began to understand there was some power in forgiving.   Going back to the business and my dad’s life…   The business continued to suck everything my dad had… Financially, emotionally, mentally… And it was such a bad investment that no one else would buy it.   Three years after my divorce, my dad was still under a tremendous amount of pressure and stress.  And one day, while he was jogging, he got a heart attack.   He passed away in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.   By the time my family and I could get ourselves to him, he was already gone.   So again, my life changed dramatically in the course of one day.   As you can imagine, the pain I endured was unbearable.   I will not go into details here about the passing of my dad. But I did write a whole chapter on it in my book  From My Heart to Yours: Based on a True Story .   I know many of you have read the book because you’ve sent me personal emails about it. The chapter that my father passed away was an extremely difficult chapter to write. I chronicled my thoughts and pain of that day verbatim.    If you’d like to learn more about my book,    click here.      Going back to my story and the passing of my dad….   At the time he passed away, I was 33 years old. Once again, I knew I was too young to go on with my life, being bitter.   And once again, I had to forgive my ex-husband. His actions had set the ball in motion for the level of stress and pressure my dad was under, ending his life with a heart attack.   So I knew I had to dig deeper into my understanding of forgiveness than before.   By the time my father had passed away, I knew enough about forgiveness to know that it could help me release so much of the pain and burden I had carried.   But I knew I had to go deeper into this understanding. So I did...   My quest and journey led me to the metaphysical book  A Course in Miracles .    A Course in Miracles  explains forgiveness in a way that is so powerful, and so enlightening. It is a deep self-study course that lasts minimum of one year to complete.   {I consider myself a lifelong student of  A Course in Miracles  because I after I finish it, I go back and start from the beginning again… I’ve done this several times so far, in my journey}   Having been a student of  A Course in Miracles  for years, I now understand forgiveness on such a deep level. And it has altered my life in the most tremendous and liberating ways.   This leads me to share with you the Forgiveness Course I have out on Insight Timer.   I have poured my heart and soul into the creation of that course.   And this also leads me to two moments I’d like to share with you.   The first is a full circle moment…   As I write this blog for you, it is the morning of July 27th. Twelve years ago, on this exact date, my mom told me what my ex-husband did. And hence, on that morning of July 27, 2006, I knew my life had changed forever, and I had to divorce.   And hence, my journey into forgiveness began.   As far as me writing this blog for you on July 27th, it’s not something I did intentionally. It is just the only day/time that worked out with my schedule. But as I sit here, with my laptop, writing to you… I feel with my whole Being what a full circle moment this is.   And the moment of synchronicity I’d like to share with you…   And this one is    BIG    for me…   July 29th would have been my father’s birthday. July 30th is the date Insight Timer chose to release my course.   I feel so nostalgic about these dates. I could say this course being released one day after my father’s birthday is my gift to him. It's my gift for carrying out his legacy by now teaching about forgiveness.   But the truth is, it was his gift to me all along. He instilled the qualities of forgiveness in me. I’ve just taken them and deeply understood and refined them.   And now, on behalf of my father and I, we share the course on Insight Timer with all of you.   The ten-day course is titled  Find Freedom Through Forgiveness . And can be found by clicking the link below:    http://insig.ht/course_find-freedom-through-forgiveness         If you know of anyone who could benefit from the message of this newsletter, please share it with them.      I wish you a beautiful week!   With Gratitude,   Michelle     MichelleZarrin.com  info@MichelleZarrin.com  Instagram:  www.instagram.com/michelle_zarrin/  Facebook:  www.facebook.com/Michelle-Zarrin-490548611007735/

Dear Newsletter Family,
 
Once you read this story, you’ll be able to imagine there is so much more to the events, and depth of feeling with each sentence I’ve written. But for the purposes of this newsletter, I’ve kept this story concise. The end of this newsletter is what I am so nostalgic to share with you… My moment of synchronicity….
 
And by the way, my full story can be found in my book From My Heart to Yours: Based on a True Story.
 
My father passed away about 8.5 years ago.
 
Upon his passing, I asked myself many questions about his life… And about the meaning of life in general. One of the questions I asked myself was, “What was my dad’s legacy? What did he teach me that I want to carry on?”
 
The answer came to me immediately.
 
There are two things my father taught me:

To give back

Forgiveness

 
I knew I would carry his legacy by giving back.
And since I had already been on my own personal journey of forgiveness, I knew I was already carrying out that legacy as well.
 
Three years prior to my dad’s passing, my own journey of forgiveness began.
 
The person I had to forgive was my ex-husband.
 
My ex-husband had coerced and manipulated my father into purchasing a business. The business was actually a really bad investment, and did not make any money. But my ex-husband had teamed up with the seller of that business and made up paperwork and financial statements to show it was actually profitable. And my ex-husband was to get a commission off the selling price.
 
I had zero idea all of this was going on. And the day I found out, was the day I knew my life had taken a very different turn. I knew I could not trust the man I called my husband. He had set out to manipulate, and ultimately deeply hurt, my father, myself and every member of my family.
 
So my process of divorce began….
 
At the time, I had been married for 8.5 years. And I was 30 years old. I had known my ex-husband since high school, since I was 15 years old… So I had grown up with him, and known him for half my life.
 
It was a deeply painful time for me. The level of pain and guilt I felt was unbearable.
 
My guilt came from the fact that the man I had loved, the man that I brought into my family, and they made him one of their own, turned on us so ruthlessly.
 
It was a period where I was lost, confused, sad, hurt and a myriad of other emotions all at the same time.
 
But at the age of 30, I knew I was too young to be bitter at life.
 
So I embarked on a journey to forgive, and to make sense of my life.
 
{This journey led me to meditation}.
 
I began the process of forgiveness while I was going through my divorce.
 
I just didn’t want to hold resentment or grudges. I knew enough about forgiveness to know I was doing this for myself, not for my ex-husband.
 
And it worked…
 
I began to feel lighter. I removed myself (veeeeeeery slowly, day by day) from the pain he had caused myself and my family. I began to understand there was some power in forgiving.
 
Going back to the business and my dad’s life…
 
The business continued to suck everything my dad had… Financially, emotionally, mentally… And it was such a bad investment that no one else would buy it.
 
Three years after my divorce, my dad was still under a tremendous amount of pressure and stress.

And one day, while he was jogging, he got a heart attack.
 
He passed away in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.
 
By the time my family and I could get ourselves to him, he was already gone.
 
So again, my life changed dramatically in the course of one day.
 
As you can imagine, the pain I endured was unbearable.
 
I will not go into details here about the passing of my dad. But I did write a whole chapter on it in my book From My Heart to Yours: Based on a True Story.
 
I know many of you have read the book because you’ve sent me personal emails about it. The chapter that my father passed away was an extremely difficult chapter to write. I chronicled my thoughts and pain of that day verbatim.  

If you’d like to learn more about my book,
click here.
 
Going back to my story and the passing of my dad….
 
At the time he passed away, I was 33 years old. Once again, I knew I was too young to go on with my life, being bitter.
 
And once again, I had to forgive my ex-husband. His actions had set the ball in motion for the level of stress and pressure my dad was under, ending his life with a heart attack.
 
So I knew I had to dig deeper into my understanding of forgiveness than before.
 
By the time my father had passed away, I knew enough about forgiveness to know that it could help me release so much of the pain and burden I had carried.
 
But I knew I had to go deeper into this understanding. So I did...
 
My quest and journey led me to the metaphysical book A Course in Miracles.
 
A Course in Miracles explains forgiveness in a way that is so powerful, and so enlightening. It is a deep self-study course that lasts minimum of one year to complete.
 
{I consider myself a lifelong student of A Course in Miracles because I after I finish it, I go back and start from the beginning again… I’ve done this several times so far, in my journey}
 
Having been a student of A Course in Miracles for years, I now understand forgiveness on such a deep level. And it has altered my life in the most tremendous and liberating ways.
 
This leads me to share with you the Forgiveness Course I have out on Insight Timer.
 
I have poured my heart and soul into the creation of that course.
 
And this also leads me to two moments I’d like to share with you.
 
The first is a full circle moment…
 
As I write this blog for you, it is the morning of July 27th. Twelve years ago, on this exact date, my mom told me what my ex-husband did. And hence, on that morning of July 27, 2006, I knew my life had changed forever, and I had to divorce.
 
And hence, my journey into forgiveness began.
 
As far as me writing this blog for you on July 27th, it’s not something I did intentionally. It is just the only day/time that worked out with my schedule. But as I sit here, with my laptop, writing to you… I feel with my whole Being what a full circle moment this is.
 
And the moment of synchronicity I’d like to share with you…
 
And this one is
BIG for me…
 
July 29th would have been my father’s birthday.
July 30th is the date Insight Timer chose to release my course.
 
I feel so nostalgic about these dates. I could say this course being released one day after my father’s birthday is my gift to him. It's my gift for carrying out his legacy by now teaching about forgiveness.
 
But the truth is, it was his gift to me all along. He instilled the qualities of forgiveness in me. I’ve just taken them and deeply understood and refined them.
 
And now, on behalf of my father and I, we share the course on Insight Timer with all of you.
 
The ten-day course is titled Find Freedom Through Forgiveness. And can be found by clicking the link below:

http://insig.ht/course_find-freedom-through-forgiveness
 
If you know of anyone who could benefit from the message of this newsletter, please share it with them.
 
I wish you a beautiful week!
 
With Gratitude,
 
Michelle
 
 
MichelleZarrin.com
info@MichelleZarrin.com
Instagram: www.instagram.com/michelle_zarrin/
Facebook: www.facebook.com/Michelle-Zarrin-490548611007735/